T.I. Lowe’s Lulu’s Cafe caught the eye of a publisher after it became a reader favourite when T.I. first released it as an indie author. Tyndale House has republished this novel so an even wider audience gets to know Lulu, Leah, and Crowley. I’m delighted to have T.I. with us today sharing Crowley’s dating advice! Once you’ve learned about dating and gentleman, be sure to enter the giveaway below for the chance to nab your own copy of Lulu’s Cafe, thanks to Tyndale House.

Crowley Mason’s Dating Advice

1. Actually ask the lady out. Don’t tell. And there’s nothing wrong with using a little flirt in your voice when asking. Dating should be fun, after all. Remember, don’t go asking if you ain’t willing to pay, because that’s just tacky.
2. No drive-by pickups. Get your behind out of the vehicle, knock on the door, walk her to her side of the vehicle, open the door, and help her inside. Easy yet impressive.
3. Keep your phone put away and use the ancient form of vocal conversation to get to know her better. If you’re not familiar with how this works, let me explain. . . . Use your voice, speaking words, and then use your ears to listen to the words she speaks while maintaining eye contact.
4. Small gestures such as holding hands or placing your palm on her back while leading the way is okay, because, great day, you have to let her know you’re interested. But pay attention! If she’s not comfortable with that, then keep your hands to yourself. And make sure she’s being respectful in return and keeps her hands to herself too!
5. Always be a gentleman. Always! Read further to understand this better.

Look up gentleman in the dictionary, and you will find the following words: chivalrous, courteous, honorable, good manners, noble, high standard of conduct. There’s been quite a lot of speculation that this species of men is close to extinction, but why?

The gentleman aka hero from Lulu’s Café has stirred a lot of buzz. Crowley is all about his Southern manners and treating others with respect. He understands the significance of giving a small gift, holding a door, carrying a lady’s bag, paying attention to what his lady has to say, and being mindful to flirt and tease without being vulgar. Shoot, he even asked permission for a kiss. Readers have made comments, wishing there were Crowley Masons in the real world. But I ask the question: Why can’t there be gentlemen still in existence? I know of two right off the top of my head: my husband and my son. Both of whom I hold to a high standard. If we expect more from the men in our lives, and respect ourselves enough to live by higher morals ourselves, then it’s not such an unreasonable idea.

Let’s get real for a moment. It’s easy to lay all the blame on the male species, but, ladies, we have a giant part in this as well. As a woman. As a mother. As a role model.

As a woman, I have to respect myself. That includes not settling for a man who doesn’t treat me with respect. Again, this goes both ways. In order to receive respect, you have to give it. There is nothing wrong with having high standards for others in your life. If a relationship is toxic in any way, then get rid of it. I’m not sure when the notion of having to put up with “less than” actually became a thing, but it’s time society banishes that idea for a better quality of life.

As the mother of a son, I have taken on my role in teaching him what a gentleman is and how he should treat women. And let’s be serious, it’s not a complicated concept to understand, but it’s still something that has to be taught. Simple things that can mean a great deal to the one receiving them. From the time he’s been able to speak, I’ve encouraged him to use his manners. Thank you can go a long way. He’s even written thank-you notes for different occasions. As early as middle school, I instilled in him the importance of walking a female friend to the door and not leaving until he speaks to her parents. And now that he is a teenager and old enough to date, I’ve made other facets of being a gentleman clear. An example of this is: If he asks someone out, it is on him to pay. Case closed. Again, it’s all about respect and showing your significant other how important they are to you.

As a role model for my daughter, I understand that my relationship with my husband will be her idea of what a relationship is supposed to be. Just reflect on this for a minute: If I let my husband disrespect me, ignore my needs, pay me no attention, mistreat me in any way, not love me enough to want to provide for me, then I am telling my daughter this is the low standard she should accept. Oh, no, ma’am! Thankfully, I am blessed to have a gentleman as my spouse. I didn’t settle for anything less than Crowley-worthy love. And I respect him enough to show the same love in return. I’ve made it clear to my daughter that it is a choice and encourage her to choose wisely.

It’s the same for everyone. We can all choose to respect ourselves enough to look for only high-standard quality in a significant other. Maybe if we all take this mind-set on, the extinction of the gentleman can be avoided.

Lulu’s Cafe

When a damaged young woman is given a chance to reclaim her life in a small South Carolina town, she must reckon with the dark secrets she left behind in order to accept the love she deserves.

On the run from a violent past, Leah Allen arrived in tiny Rivertown, South Carolina, battered and broken, but ready to reinvent herself. By a stroke of fate, Leah is drawn to the Southern hospitality of a small café, looking for a warm meal but finding so much more. Lulu, the owner, offers her a job, a place to stay and a new lease on life. Through Lulu’s tenacious warmth and generosity, Leah quickly finds herself embraced by the quaint community as she tries to put herself back together. Given she’s accustomed to cruelty, the kindness is overwhelming.

Soon Leah meets Crowley Mason, the most eligible bachelor in town. A lawyer and friend of Lulu’s, Crowley is wary of Leah’s sudden, mysterious arrival. Despite his reserve, something sparks between them that can’t be denied. But after all she’s been through, can Leah allow herself to truly love and be loved, especially when her first urge is to run?

Exploring the resiliency of both the heart and the spirit, Lulu’s Café gorgeously illustrates how old scars can finally heal no matter how deep they seem.

What was the working title?

Lulu’s Café

Describe your book in 5 adjectives

Emotional, gripping, charming, soul-touching, relevant

Which character did you enjoy writing most?

Lulu. She’s the type of woman I aspire to be. Rich in wisdom and understanding, she generously shows compassion when others readily look the other way.

Which character gave you the most grief?

Jessup Barns. The stinker liked to get into mischief.

What emotions do you think your story will generate in readers?

This book covers an extensive list. They will hurt, get angry, mourn, laugh, and cry.

What emotions did you experience while writing this story?

I hurt, I got angry, I mourned, I laughed, and I cried.

How do you choose your characters’ names?

There is no defined way I choose character names. It really comes down to what feels right. I’ve had to rename a character a time or two because the first choice didn’t suit them. I can tell you how I don’t name them, though. I always stay away from names of people close to me for main characters. This keeps them unique in my creative world and not familiar, but I do slip in personal names for side characters.

Thanks T.I. – such a fun and meaningful feature!

Tonya “T.I.” Lowe is a native of coastal South Carolina.  She attended Coastal Carolina University and the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga, where she majored in psychology but excelled in creative writing.  In 2014, Tonya independently published her first novel, which quickly became a bestseller.  Now the author of 10 published novels with hundreds of thousands of copies sold, she knows she’s just getting started and has many more stories to tell.  She resides near Myrtle Beach with her family.

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