I have a unique life calling. God has given me a passion to lovingly teach young people and adults what the Bible says about God’s awesome plan for sexuality while also exposing strategies the demonic world uses against humanity. Yes, I travel the country talking about sexuality and Satan. Unique, I told you.

True to my calling, I have some invaluable insight for overcoming the demonic, disheartening belief that, when faced with overwhelming emotions or circumstances, there’s no way out—particularly for teens.

Trapped in a Double Bind?

I know from personal experience that a common tactic our spiritual enemy uses against us is to create a double bind—a belief system where, when confronted with a crippling fear or distressing dilemma, we become convinced we have only two options, and both are insufferable. The reassuring truth, however, is God always provides us with a liberating option—a hope-filled way out. We need only seek Him to see it.

By way of example, I’m sure the Children of Israel thought they were as good as dead when they reached the Red Sea, only to have the mighty Egyptians close in on them. Who knew God was about to part the ocean on their behalf and usher them to safety while also drowning their attackers (Exodus 14)?

As our society at large drifts further away from a biblical foundation, today’s young people desperately need to hear the incredible biblical accounts of God’s intervention in what appear to be lose-lose situations, thus being introduced to the God of all comfort, who provides a way of escape from double binds—the “inevitable doom” the devil insists is upon us.

Four months after the deadly overlord Molek has been banished beyond the city limits of Masonville, Texas, Owen Edmonds’s crucial mission to save lives escalates when seven Cosmic Rulers of darkness close in to decimate his town―and nation. As the battle between good and evil culminates in an epic standoff, Owen and his girlfriend, Ray Anne, must make the decision of a lifetime: will they face their fears or run?

The Defiance is the third book in the Delusion series.

Commonly Believed Double Binds Debunked

The following are some double binds commonly believed among today’s teens, along with some encouraging, liberating options available through Christ:

• I have to live in misery or kill myself.

I know what it’s like to be suffering so severely mentally and emotionally that you truly feel you cannot endure it another hour, much less another day, and everything seems to indicate there’s no hope of ever being happy or halfway normal again. This is when the spirit of suicide (yes, a demonic spirit) whispers to our soul that death is the only way to escape the pain.

BUT WAIT! Our tormenting thoughts and emotions are tied to a soul wound of some sort that’s causing us to feel rejected, abandoned, ashamed, unloved—all kinds of emotions that physically pain the body and torment the mind. God knows exactly what that soul wound is and wants to reveal it to us, expose the resulting lies we’re believing, and heal the most traumatized, suffering places in our soul.

Healing rarely comes in an instant, but God is faithful to carry us through every moment of the journey and lead us to renewed hope and life, not premature death. It requires that we seek God in prayerful relationship, embrace His biblical promises, and get help from people (our next point), but the good news is, you and I can find complete freedom from seemingly immovable depression and suicidal thoughts—only to discover in the long run, our lives are much richer for having overcome it!

He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds. Psalm 147:3

To all who mourn . . . he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. Isaiah 61:3

The thief’s [Satan’s] purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My [Jesus’s] purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life. John 10:10

• I’m hurting and want to tell someone, but people will only judge me or not care.

Every predatory animal knows to seek out and pounce on prey that’s injured and isolated from its herd. Our enemy does the same, prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:8). Case in point, Satan will give us reason after reason to convince us we must not or cannot tell anyone about our pain or seek help.

BUT WAIT! Did you know God created our brains so that when we describe a painful memory or share our suffering and someone responds with compassion, our brain structures experience transformation and healing? We are not meant to suffer in silence. We must seek out wise, caring people who will listen and encourage us. We cannot allow pride, a fear of being judged, or any other hinderance to stop up from seeking help.

If you confide in someone and he or she doesn’t respond supportively, look for someone else! Ask the Lord to guide you to the relative or caring adult who will walk with you through your healing journey—ideally someone who will pray with you and encourage you with biblical truth.

Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense. Proverbs 27:9

• I’m sick of striving for people’s approval, but if I stop, people won’t like me.

Rejection is such a strong, destructive emotion that it triggers pain receptors in the brain, causing us to physically ache as if we’re suffering from a bodily injury. No wonder we can become desperate to feel liked and accepted by others: rejection hurts!

Instinct tells us the way to combat feelings of rejection is to do whatever it takes to earn others’ approval—especially if our family life is lacking in affirmation and unconditional love. Unfortunately, striving to earn others’ approval serves only to strap us to an exhausting roller coaster—extreme highs when it seems we’ve managed to impress people, followed by extreme lows when we feel we’ve failed to measure up.

BUT WAIT! God never meant for us to base our sense of value and worth on what others think of us, nor how they treat us. Hurting people hurt people, and people will inevitably fail at times to validate our worth and value—especially people strapped to the roller coaster of man-pleasing!

God created you and me to enjoy a loving relationship with Him, and as our Creator, He alone has the right to declare our worth. When we look to Jesus by being mindful of His reassuring presence and having faith in His Word (the Bible), we find the limitless love and worth for which we’ve been searching.  If we’ve grown accustomed to viewing ourselves as worthless and rejected, it can take time to renew our minds to the truth that we are deeply loved and cherished by God, but it’s so worth it to let God set the record straight!

See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him. 1 John 3:1

Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant. Galatians 1:10

The Lord your God is living among [with] you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs. Zephaniah 3:17

• I don’t want this addiction (porn, drugs, etc.), but I can’t resist it.

When we have unmet needs or suffer hurtful experiences and emotions, our fallen human nature is inclined to turn away from God, the ultimate Healer, and indulge in counterfeit methods of meeting our own needs or escaping discomfort, if even temporarily.

Just as Satan intends, these counterfeit means initially appear to serve our interests, but eventually begin to master and enslave us, soon proving only to deepen our unmet needs and worsen our inner wounds. By the time we recognize that our addiction is sabotaging us, we often feel helpless to resist.

BUT WAIT! God has never asked us to overcome sin and addiction in our own strength, dependent on our own willpower. Instead He invites to rely on His Holy Spirit to give us the strength we need to overcome—His strength when we are weak (aka grace). God also wants to reveal to us why we keep turning to that addiction so we can replace our dependency and escapism with healthy, Christ-centered ways to get our needs met and manage unsettling moods and emotions.

There are countless people, myself included, who have found freedom from addictive mindsets and behaviors that, apart from God’s grace, never would have been beatable.

This High Priest of ours [Jesus] understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. Hebrews 4:15-16

My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness. 2 Corinthians 12:9

The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure. 1 Corinthians 10:13

Thanks for sharing such an important message, Laura.

LAURA GALLIER is the author of the Delusion series, an award-winning young adult novel series that sheds light on the unseen battle between good and evil—currently in development for feature film. Laura is also the co-author of the 4 Freedom Bible Study, a practical guide for overcoming spiritual warfare. Her latest book in the Delusion series, The Defiance, releases November 3. Purchase Laura’s books at major retail outlets, and learn more about her at LauraGallier.com!

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